Tuesday, March 17, 2009
I have this idea:
I am going to pretend that I am tougher and more capable than I am.
I am going to wear this invisible mask and costume, just as if I were performing a play, and tackle the world with immense confidence and certainty.
one version will be my Cycling Hero: my invisible cloak will provide me with super powers so that I will conquer every hill in front of me, never losing my breath or muscle power. I will be able to ride for hours and hours without exhaustion ever even looking my way.
another version will be Super Mom: nothing my children say or do will ever faze me. they can talk back to me, disregard their chores, laze about like slugs and I will be impervious. even better, they will be inspired by my very presence to do all those things they are supposed to be doing. willingly. with smiles on their little faces.
then there will be Work Hero: my invisible costume with allow me to be tough, strong, and irresolute. I will neither explain nor defend myself, but will just do what needs to be done. no fears or squirming, no hesitation in asking for what is fairly mine. my expectations will be high, and will be met.
this is sounding awfully good, isn't it?
perhaps the only remaining category is that where I take care of myself, nurture myself, and support all of the tough work I'm doing out there in that "real" world I face every day.
which really isn't real, at all, is it?
most of what we confront every day is of our own creation. it's all about our own mindset, and how we view what we experience. that perspective thing.
if I think the world is unkind and evil, I will find evidence to support that.
if I think the world is glorious and full of beauty and kindnesses, I will find evidence to support that belief.
this afternoon I received a surprise from another continent, and it made my heart glow for a brief time. and I could have done two different things with that: I could have reacted by thinking, oh, it was just a small thing, and now it's gone, and it wasn't enough, or I could have thought, wow, that was so great, I am so thankful for that amazing event: I am going to treasure it.
I choose the latter.
so, super mom/cycling hero/work hero/nurturing me is leaping into my life, full force.
be prepared for miracles.