the universe is always providing lessons, whether we like it or not, and today I decided the universe is trying to teach me how to be more camel-like.
no, it's not about water.
it's about starvation and gluttony.
not, it's not about food.
it's about our wishes and dreams and desires, and how the universe goes about fulfilling them.
I can go for days on end (weeks, fortnights, often months) without much of a concession at all from the universe that yes, susan is working hard to achieve these goals and she might just benefit from some little acknowledgment that she's on the right path.
the business phone doesn't ring. the feelers I put out there about certain new activities go without response. people barely acknowledge my existence. I'm in a holding pattern with a new vendor. someone is late paying me money they owe. I'm waiting for responses from institutions with which I must deal. I ride up the same old hills in the same old time and way I always have.
I start to wobble, to falter, to question, to become impatient, to lean toward a funk.
this is when I realize I should have filled my little dromedarian hump with more than I did. I should have taken in a little more resolve, faith, courage, fuel.
today I was showered with reward: phone calls, orders, answers, responses, acknowledgments. I can feel my hump rising, filling, preparing for the next drought. and I am going to remember, this time, to keep giving it a little more than I think it needs so that I can make it a little further next time.
a few more pats on the back, a little more trust in single-lifetime karma. more faith. more self-belief. more awareness of just how much I'm doing right.
I'm not sure why the universe chooses to operate as it does, parching us then slamming us with hydration, but I'm going to start paying a little closer attention. going to start keeping my little dromedarian hump filled with just a bit more sustenance.