Monday, August 11, 2008


recovery ride today. lately my route for a recovery ride takes me first to Michigan, and then to Tuscany, and that just makes me smile. Okay, in reality it's Michigan Avenue and Tuscany the restaurant, but in my mind . . .

recovery rides are about keeping my heart rate below a certain number, and this is always challenging. and my heart monitor was playing games this morning, as I know that my heart wasn't really beating 228 times per minute about a mile into my ride. then it would jump from 159 to 179 when my effort didn't increase at all, and then it would sit at 44 for a good couple of minutes . . . now I have plenty friends who don't wear heart monitors, because they KNOW when they're working hard. I understand that, and I think I'll probably be there someday. but for now, that observation and adjustment is important for me.

so "heart" is on my mind, especially since my monitor is acting up. then I ride by a sign for a company called "" and I think this is kind of clever and I segue right into What Moves You . . . and I know that when I get home I will come to the computer, close my eyes, and type a list of what moves me. so here is a list of what comes to me this morning:

ordinary people doing ordinary things
adults with down syndrome
baby quail
starving children
crisp, cold mornings like this one
brilliant sunlight behind clouds that makes them appear to have silver edges
the tremendous expanse of night sky covered with stars
small gestures of love
swooping down curving roads
water, in just about any natural form
one of my children teaching another something
my oldest son laughing
people in emotional pain
deer, especially young bucks with furry antlers
the smell of lemongrass
nights in white satin, by the moody blues

a small list, but no small feelings attached. and this is how it all comes together for me: some of the things that move me are like my heart beating in a slightly elevated zone. it isn't uncomfortable, it feels good, and it's good for me. and some of the other things that move me are like my heart beating in a higher zone: intense, a little uncomfortable, but still good. and still others send my heart over the edge, like my monitor this morning. too high of a heart rate, for too long, doesn't feel good at all. it hurts, it can make you ill. some of the things that move me impact me this way, and I really can't sustain that feeling for too long. I have to move my thoughts to something less intense, I need to move out of that zone.
hearts are beautiful and fragile, vital, almost incomprehensible. I exercise my physical heart to stay healthy and alive, using a monitor and a guideline. I exercise my emotional heart, also, and find that perhaps I need to work those higher zones a little more, so that it's not so uncomfortable to be there.

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