the tao of cycling: fantasies, part two

Thursday, August 14, 2008

fantasies, part two

"perception is reality."
we've all heard this, in one form or another, at least once. I take it to mean that we all see things differently, and what we see or perceive is true for us.
which is terrifying, in a way, if you think of it on a broad scale. we could go into a discussion of quantum physics here, but I couldn't do it justice, and while quantum physics seem to be in vogue, it is quite difficult to bring down to earth and make user-friendly. to even imagine that we create our own reality is mind-boggling.

so for today I'll stick with this: what I perceive to be true is my truth.

so, that means the dead bug carcass I saw while riding last week was real.
at least for me.
I saw this huge insect carcass on the shoulder of the road, and my first thought was "huge dead bug," and my second thought was, "no, it was a pinecone." even my own mind was trying to talk itself out of accepting its reality. the body was huge and orangish and basically the stuff of nightmares. a little bit further up the road I saw another one, not quite so large, but still scary. and then I saw one more, that could have been just part of a body, I'm not sure, as it was just a quick glance as I rode past.
after passing these three things, my mind went to work.
ooh, gross, scary, that thing was huge! this is totally what nightmares are made of, or maybe, some really good young adult fantasy books. kingdoms where huge insects reign, or maybe they're just the military force like the wicked witch's flying monkeys.
after my ride I came to my computer to search the internet for information about what this carcass could have been. well, nothing seemed to fit. and everyone I told about it would get this skeptical look in their eye, like, sure, susan, uh-huh, you saw a really big bug. like that fish grandpa caught a few years back . . . it was this big . . .
I stand by my truth. I saw a big hideous, huge, scary bug body. It was rusty orange and had hairy legs and it was at least three inches long, and when I run out of writing material I am going to start a fantasy novel about a kingdom protected by fighting forces made of platoons of them.
because these darn things are real.
at least for me.
really.

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the Male Ego

The other day I was coming down a canyon in my drop bars (two years ago I would have said, 'what's a drop bar?'), working hard, when I came up on two guys who were also heading downhill but at a more leisurely pace. I passed them, said hello as I did so, and pulled back into the bike lane. a few minutes later they went flying past me, faces looking dead ahead, not a single bit of acknowledgment that I even existed on this planet let alone was involved in and enjoying the same sport they were.
I have to attribute this to the male ego. what else can it be? now I know we all have egos, myself included. and mine even shows its ridiculous little head once in a while, or perhaps more often. but the difference between mine and say, those of certain men on bicycles, is that I KNOW mine exists and I can LAUGH at mine. I know my ego was quite excited to pass those guys, and I could also smile because I knew if the men had really been working like I was, they would have kicked my butt down the hill.
I think I pissed them off.
and I'm sure I will be sharing with you much more of my thoughts about the male ego . . .

a little history

I was married, and I had a mountain bike which I rarely rode. we separated, I moved out, and four months later someone stole my bike. the next spring, 2005, I bought myself a new mountain bike. I rode occasionally, and in april 2006 I rode in my first century, the Cactus Hugger in St. George, Utah. I made it 54 miles on that mountain bike, and it took me about 6 hours. I think that included the rest stops where I prayed that someone would steal my bike again . . .
in june 2006 I started riding my mountain bike five mornings a week, a 45-55 minute loop that was intended to be all about exercise. and what I found was that I loved the quiet, peaceful morning full of bird chatter and barely breaking sunrises. by that fall I was hooked, and began considering the purchase of a road bike. I rode up emigration canyon for the first time that Labor Day of 2006, panting and plowing along on my trusty (heavy) bike, and a month later I was the proud owner of my own road bike: I had become a two-bike girl!
a 17-week-long "power camp" over the winter and a handful of new friends kept bicycling front and center in my life, and when spring of 2007 rolled around I was ready to hit the pavement. I rode my first century the end of april, when I again went to St. George and completed that Cactus Hugger. it took me about 7 hours, but this time I rode the entire 100 miles with about 9300 feet of vertical gain. woo hoo!
I started riding canyons around our area, emigration and millcreek, city creek, big cottonwood, little mountain and big mountain, and once--yes, only once--little cottonwood.
then in september of 2007, I rode from Logan, Utah, to Jackson, Wyoming, in the slightly infamous LOTOJA race. I rode, I did not race. and I completed the thing, crediting my good training buddies, the incredibly perfect weather, my support team, and an amazing convergence of all things positive in the universe.
I put in about 3500 miles last season, and as of today, july 19, 2008, I have about 1700 in, adding to it every day.
I have again signed on to ride the LOTOJA race, and my goal is to have just somewhere near as great a ride as I did last year. oh, and to have someone fun to talk with along the way as I got incredibly bored last year . . . star valley is still a nightmare scene in my biking memories . . .
and here is a picture of the machine that has helped me reclaim my life.