back on the (proverbial) horse

this is the way of cycling, the tao of cycling:
one just keeps getting back on the horse.
one just keeps those legs circling around and around, even though at times they may be making ellipses instead of pure circles. the key is to just keep going.

this morning I rode up emigration for the first early-morning time in 9 days. and it felt pretty grand to be back on that horse.
in those intervening 8 days I've had 2 (two!) pure rest days, 2 recovery ride days, 2 grinding rides from you-know-where, 1 evening ride, and one yoga-only day.
each one of those days has been important to my process: thought-out, necessary, and committed to because it was the right thing to do.
but I've missed my old horse, my emigration-in-the-early-morning ride.
missed it and not missed it, because of those 8 intervening days I was able to sleep in 4 times. ah, I do love sleep.
last night, the thought of getting up and out the door by 5:30 again was painful.
but it put me back into my rhythm, that rhythm where one knee rises as the other falls, training is over before the kids go to school, and my day starts with peace and stars and --- if I'm lucky --- moonlight.

the way of cycling is my way of being, as ingrained as my belief in the powers of love and harmony. and the key to cycling is truly to just keep pedaling.

I noticed tuesday, during my 9 hours of riding with bill, that my legs went around many, many more times than his did.
now there are 3 reasons for this:
first, I have more low gears than he does, so during climbs I can gear down and spin around more than he can.
second, he is stronger than I am, so when he's riding beside me he can pedal, pedal, pedal then pause, and still stay next to me.
third, he is heavier than me, so on descents he can go faster and coast further than I can: I always have to start pedaling again before he does.

this is just a fact of cycling.

and it is also a fact of life: some of us have to do more pedaling than others.
because of circumstances, because of genetics. because of fate, destiny, karma, what have you: some of us just plain old have to pedal more.
that doesn't make anyone smarter or better or wiser: they are just different realities.

in the cycling reality, it's possible my knees tire before bill's do; perhaps they'll wear out sooner. or perhaps they will gain unknown strengths because of this reality.

I don't know.

what I do know is that my plan is to just keep moving forward. to keep pedaling, whether on my bike or off. and to always remember the sometimes subtle but always existent joys of hopping back on that horse.