the glass is half full.
the glass is half empty.
the 8 oz glass has 4 oz of water in it.
I tend to live in the last category, and call myself (among other things) a realist. I definitely have a positive outlook, and even consider myself optimistic, but my optimism is tempered with a healthy dose of reality.
this drives some people crazy, just as I'm sure optimists and pessimists do the same to others.
one of my biking partners told me the other day, "if you always think you have a tailwind, you do." I thought about hitting him. honestly. wishing and thinking just can't always make it so, and why should it? what's wrong with me noticing that I have a headwind pushing against me? I don't dwell on it, I don't bemoan it for long, and I don't turn around because of it . . . but I want to be able to point out that it's there without being considered negative.
there are plenty things in life that conflict with our dreams about how life might be, and I see nothing wrong with acknowledging them. to whine, complain, and not move forward because of them is unwise and self-defeating, but to pretend they don't exist isn't necessary, either.
I have a child who says to me at least two or three times a day, "you know what I hate?" and then goes on to tell me her latest gripe. they are usually minor annoyances, and I try not to roll my eyes when I hear the question. I get tired of hearing what she hates. I want to hear about something she loves! sometime!
but she's entitled to recognize and verbalize those things that irritate her, and if she wants to say she hates them, that needs to be okay. and I'm hoping it's just a phase.
it's okay to hate things, to wish or want them to be done differently.
it's also okay to love things, to share your joy about them with everyone you know.
and it's okay to see things cleanly and simply, and just be aware without attaching any strong feelings to them at all.
and I guess my favorite people are accomplished at merging all three of these as they go through life, without imposing their way of thinking and viewing things upon anyone else.