the tao of cycling: old dogs and new tricks

Monday, June 29, 2009

old dogs and new tricks

I discovered something about myself this past weekend.
a few things, actually.
which illuminates the concept that a good life is never static.
I thought I was a certain way, and circumstances conspired to show me a slightly different picture of myself, as well as providing me an opportunity for a new experience that I found completely joyful and fulfilling, not in the least bit the disappointment I feared it might be.

I am on a distribution list to receive a weekly email message from a man named Steven Lane Taylor, and after I started working on this post this morning, I happened to open his message for the week. the following is a direct quote:

"You may not know yourself as well as you think you do!

Regardless of how certain you are about what makes you happy, I suspect that there are many things in life that could bring you great joy, and you are relatively unaware of what those things are. There are many experiences that your soul hungers to have that you are simply not in touch with . . . yet.

Fortunately, the divine flow knows you better than you know yourself. It not only knows what you "think" you want, but it also knows what you really need deep down inside. It knows what makes your spirit soar, and it is continually guiding you to the effortless fulfillment of those unconscious desires . . . as well as your more conscious ones."

a perfect dovetail with my thoughts this morning!

what happened for me last weekend is that my plans changed 2 days before the MS ride. I had been planning to ride the event with a friend who was on a different team, but then that plan was altered.
thus I was placed in a situation where I had to function with a group of people I hardly knew and would barely recognize if they were wearing street clothes: my Bad Ass teammates. I had met a few of these Bad Ass riders on the 2 training rides I participated in during the past months, but not many. and both of those training rides were ridden loosely, everyone at their own pace and just re-grouping at key points along the way.
the team rides this past weekend were serious pace line, pelaton-type riding, with usually between 15 and 30 of us sticking together as a herd.
and it was beautiful.
they rode fast enough to keep me challenged, and slowly enough to let me keep breathing.
I rode next to different people throughout the rides, learning names and discovering personalities. I drafted a lot, and I pulled a bit. I chatted and laughed and have never enjoyed riding a hundred miles more.
what more could I ask for?

Steven ends his message with these words:

"By all means, go ahead and let the Universe know where it is you "think" you want to go. But remember to always be open to arriving at a different destination than the one you originally set your sights on. Because when you let the divine flow lead the way, chances are it will direct you to a destination that is greater, grander, and more deeply fulfilling than anything you ever imagined . . . or even thought possible."

I know this, deep down I know this, however it is still difficult to let go of the reins at times.
so every time I have an experience like that of this past weekend, I float a little higher on those clouds I sometimes walk on. I was brave, I jumped in with both feet (and both wheels), and I had an absolutely fantastic new experience.
thanks, universe.

[you can join Steven's weekly message list by sending an email to him at sltaylor@rowrowrow.com ]

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the Male Ego

The other day I was coming down a canyon in my drop bars (two years ago I would have said, 'what's a drop bar?'), working hard, when I came up on two guys who were also heading downhill but at a more leisurely pace. I passed them, said hello as I did so, and pulled back into the bike lane. a few minutes later they went flying past me, faces looking dead ahead, not a single bit of acknowledgment that I even existed on this planet let alone was involved in and enjoying the same sport they were.
I have to attribute this to the male ego. what else can it be? now I know we all have egos, myself included. and mine even shows its ridiculous little head once in a while, or perhaps more often. but the difference between mine and say, those of certain men on bicycles, is that I KNOW mine exists and I can LAUGH at mine. I know my ego was quite excited to pass those guys, and I could also smile because I knew if the men had really been working like I was, they would have kicked my butt down the hill.
I think I pissed them off.
and I'm sure I will be sharing with you much more of my thoughts about the male ego . . .

a little history

I was married, and I had a mountain bike which I rarely rode. we separated, I moved out, and four months later someone stole my bike. the next spring, 2005, I bought myself a new mountain bike. I rode occasionally, and in april 2006 I rode in my first century, the Cactus Hugger in St. George, Utah. I made it 54 miles on that mountain bike, and it took me about 6 hours. I think that included the rest stops where I prayed that someone would steal my bike again . . .
in june 2006 I started riding my mountain bike five mornings a week, a 45-55 minute loop that was intended to be all about exercise. and what I found was that I loved the quiet, peaceful morning full of bird chatter and barely breaking sunrises. by that fall I was hooked, and began considering the purchase of a road bike. I rode up emigration canyon for the first time that Labor Day of 2006, panting and plowing along on my trusty (heavy) bike, and a month later I was the proud owner of my own road bike: I had become a two-bike girl!
a 17-week-long "power camp" over the winter and a handful of new friends kept bicycling front and center in my life, and when spring of 2007 rolled around I was ready to hit the pavement. I rode my first century the end of april, when I again went to St. George and completed that Cactus Hugger. it took me about 7 hours, but this time I rode the entire 100 miles with about 9300 feet of vertical gain. woo hoo!
I started riding canyons around our area, emigration and millcreek, city creek, big cottonwood, little mountain and big mountain, and once--yes, only once--little cottonwood.
then in september of 2007, I rode from Logan, Utah, to Jackson, Wyoming, in the slightly infamous LOTOJA race. I rode, I did not race. and I completed the thing, crediting my good training buddies, the incredibly perfect weather, my support team, and an amazing convergence of all things positive in the universe.
I put in about 3500 miles last season, and as of today, july 19, 2008, I have about 1700 in, adding to it every day.
I have again signed on to ride the LOTOJA race, and my goal is to have just somewhere near as great a ride as I did last year. oh, and to have someone fun to talk with along the way as I got incredibly bored last year . . . star valley is still a nightmare scene in my biking memories . . .
and here is a picture of the machine that has helped me reclaim my life.