Monday, March 5, 2012

one step closer

some days it feels as though you're not getting anywhere.
you wake up in the same room, follow the same exercise routine, push the same button on the coffeemaker. have the same breakfast, make the same lunch, go through the familiar routine in the shower.
work, face the same issues, make similar phone calls, have conversations you've had again and again.
and all of this can happen, daily, while you're working on changing big things in your life. incremental changes that slowly--hopefully--build upon themselves, moving you ever so minutely each day to a place that will, someday, be quite different.

I have a daughter who has been working to lose weight. since last august she has lost over thirty pounds, and she's looking fantastic. she's losing it at a rate of about 5 pounds a month, which is a healthy, consistent pace, but one that is imperceptible on a daily basis.
yet where she is today is dramatically different than where she was 6 months ago.

we forget to give ourselves credit for this kind of movement as we're working our way through it. it's hard: today looks no different than yesterday. it's easy to get caught in the mind game of I'm not getting anywhere, especially when today feels no different than yesterday.

my other daughter is a twilight fan, loves the books, loves the movies. I fell in love with a song a few weeks ago that---unbeknownst to me---is featured in breaking dawn, part I. other than that, I love the song. a refrain from this song, which is called a thousand years, is this:
one step closer.

I'm hanging my hat on this these days.
I can't see or even at times feel any movement, yet I have to keep believing that I am moving,
one step forward, one step at a time, one step closer. I am going to get there, because these small, incremental steps are going to, eventually, get me somewhere.
and today, I am one step closer than I was yesterday.

I'll let you know when I can see the peak, and for now, I am going to keep reminding myself that yes, truly, I am one step closer.

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