who to be

it takes courage to be.
it takes greater courage to be who you really are.
it takes even greater courage to be who you are meant to be.
and perhaps, the greatest courage is needed by those who dare to be a fulfillment of who they're meant to be regardless of the resistance encountered.

years ago I was given a cookbook called Wild Women in the Kitchen. it is full of recipes and brief-brief bios of some Women Who Dared. I was looking at this cookbook the other day, reading these tidbits about women ranging from pocahontas to k.d. lang to M.F.K. Fisher thinking, wow, I wish I were one of these women.

I wish I had the guts to just do what I thought was right, regardless of what others thought.
I wish I had the courage to follow my heart and not always be logical, thoughtful, cautious.
I wish I had the strength to ignore the chafe, chaff, and ugliness thrown my way.
I wish I had just a little more courage along my path to becoming exactly who I'm meant to be.

I'm not there yet.
just as I can't yet run a 10k, or bike 330 miles in three days, or fold myself into perfect yoga pretzels, I am a Wild Woman work in progress.
I hope that I'll keep working on it. to keep taking baby steps toward being brave and true, toward being filled with conviction and certainty and courage.

we meet little resistance when we sit still: it is only when we swoop and soar and dare to push outward that we do so, and it is this that we must remember. growth is painful, progress comes at a price, and nothing beautiful is ever achieved easily.

and it is this that helps me remember who it is that I need to be.
as the words (of matthew kelly's) painted on my dining room wall remind me,
it is my job to help us all become the next best version of ourselves.
and I guess the only way to do this is to be the me I am meant to be.

guess I'll go wipe off the eggs and tomatoes and keep putting one foot in front of the other.